i'm busy!!!!!!!!!!!!
sorry guys im busyyyy
happy new year!!
2024 is starting out strong with SO MUCH to celebrate, for example:
This year marks my 10 year high school reunion, which I would never go to but makes me wonder if I should throw a high school themed party in lieu of said reunion
This is the year I (/we including ben) get reallyyyyy into board games and we’ve already had 2 game nights this month (plus we rang in the new year playing the 1972 hit game Dealer’s Choice)
I got a new job!! more money! more free stuff! more meetings on a daily basis!!!???
I learned I have that weird thing about numbers where they have to be rounded to evens or multiples of 5, which I’m attempting to battle by making this list of 4 things
Because I metaphorically came to class without doing the assigned reading, we’re going to wing it here and present to you *drumroll please, but make it long because i need to buy some time* …..
How to rebrand yourself for a brand new year
Take up a very normal hobby but only perform it at increasingly specific times as if it’s a doctor’s appointment (e.g. requesting a day off work because you’re sewing a tote bag from 2-3pm on February 12th; cancelling plans because every 3rd Thursday of the month you have to knit a scarf for the first 15 minutes of every hour)
Wear the same pair of shoes everyday for the entire year (e.g. showing up to Equinox in mary janes and completing your whole leg day, inadvertently/ advertently becoming a local celebrity)
Giving friends free candy and stickers every time you see them (ensure you are financially capable of committing to this)
Start posting on Instagram like it’s 2012 and you’re Lauren Conrad
Learn the Pitbull toast and quote it casually in conversation
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Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browserFigure out how a fax machine works – not how faxing works but how a fax MACHINE works and then fill me in (you can’t Google it)
Never “hahaha”, always “tehehe”
Categorize everyone and everything as either a bimbo or a barbara (e.g. “Tom asked if we could actually start the meeting in 10 minutes? ok bimbo…”)
Bring a thermos of hot chocolate everywhere
Every time you meet someone new: Take their hand, lather it in hand sanitizer, blow it dry, then kiss them on both cheeks
byee!! xo
Number six-- fax machines turn your data into a digital signal that is sent over the phone lines and reconstituted on the other end. But that's what they'd have you believe . In fact, each fax machine contains a little monk with a quill pen who painstakingly copies your data and sends it to the wrong address.